Wonderful Illinois Organization Of Mother Of Twins Clubs Convention

We had a great time at the Illinois Organization Of Mother Of Twins Clubs. It was wonderful to speak with everyone and hear the stories. Some parents are in great school districts. One Mom told me her school district proactively called her to talk about placement for her multiples. Can you imagine?

Other Moms told us horror stories about their struggles to work with the school district.

Interestingly, we received words of encouragement from both types of Moms. Everyone wants to work together to make sure parents are the key deciders in the placement of multiples in schools.

It was great to sit and chat with so many others who completely understand the joys and challenges of raising multiples.

Thank you for making us part of your event.

Response to the Northwest Herald Article

Shari,

I read the article in today's Northwest Herald. I have 5-year-old twins who will be in kindergarten this fall. When I registered my children at the elementary school, I wrote on the form that I wanted my children in the same classroom. The principal would not meet with me in person. After some weeks with no return phone call, I called again, and the principal spoke to me on the phone. This principal was so out of line in the way she spoke to me on the phone. She doesn't know me and doesn't know my children. She doesn't want to know us, and doesn't care about the reason I was asking my twins be placed in the same classroom. When I asked her why, her response was, 'because I said so'. When I asked if this was a rule for the district, she responded, 'it's my rule'. When I told her I had a recommendation from the pre-school my children attended, she said she doesn't care what anyone else says, she does what she wants and the district stands behind her. I said I thought I was making a simple request, she interrupted me and said, 'I don't take parent requests'.


I then requested a meeting with the superintendent. He wouldn't meet with me, but spoke to me on the phone, ending by saying he'd get back to me. He never got back to me, but had the principal write me a letter. The principal's letter was very toned down compared to the phone conversation I had with her, but in her letter basically said my children were not my responsibility when they were in her school.


This has been a horrible experience for me and my family. I will be writing my Senator about enacting the Twin Law. Until today, I didn't know this existed.


Though my husband and I cannot financially afford to send our children to a private school, there is no way we will send our children to the elementary school near our home (3 doors away!!). Since my conversation with this principal, I have heard so many bad occurrences involving this principal. And, I don't want to make a big stink about this and then have my children singled out or have my children be frightened in any way by anyone in the school, including the office staff. I just find it hard to believe the superintendent refused to meet with me in person, and another principal in the same district also refused to meet with me in person. I've been very polite and I don't understand why this is happening. Every child is an individual. Just like all children are not the same, all twins are not the same.


Thank you very much.


Sincerely,
Maria
(Crystal Lake)

A Lot of Work to Do

I was at a school function when another twins Mom starting talking about her daughters. She was stunned to find out we were able to keep our girls together this school year. She was told last year that her daughters couldn't stay together, so the school district separated them.

It's one more example of the arbitrary way school districts treat twins. I know a family in our district with 4th grade twins who were able to keep the boys together last year and this year. Yet, in the preschool program, a set of twins was separated.

People say we don't need another law and I'd agree. We have waaaaay too many laws already. The problem is unless it is a law, most administrators won't even bother with it. We do have a resolution, but most educators don't know about it and if they do, they do not pay any attention to it.

It's these kinds of stories that keep us motivated to make sure that all parents, in all school districts in Illinois have a seat at the table when decisions are made about the placement of their twins.

Another Law?

When I tell people that our school district told us they would separate our twins in preschool without our consent, people are shocked. Most people just assume that parents will be included in any decision regarding their children.

Given the number of people we talk to about flexible placement of their multiples, it is clear that too many elementary schools still think twins should be separated. Why? It's a mystery to us as all the research points to a need for flexible placement.

We know that not all parents want to keep their children together. In our school district, most of the parents want their children in separate classes. We felt strongly that our children would benefit from being together. And, that's the point of our effort, really. Parents should be able to work with the schools to decide what is best.

You might be surprised to learn that we do have a resolution in Illinois. The problem is either it is ignored or school districts ignore it. And, let's face it, a resolution is nice, but it doesn't have any teeth. A law means the school district needs to follow the rules or face the consequences.

What's funny about all this is that having a flexible placement policy costs schools nothing. It's simply a meeting with parents and the principal to determine the best course of action. Even in these difficult economic times, a meeting is free, yet the outcome could make a difference between a child's success in school and his/her difficulties.

We invite you to join us in our effort to educate and legislate. Tell us your story and we'll try to help each other do what is best for our children's educations.